***(This was written as a joke. So please don't take it serious.)***
Since I posted about the dude and his mistress a couple of weeks ago I have been questioned on why I didn't write a scathing story about her. My answer to that is that I don't believe she was trained properly. She obviously doesn't have all the right information. I know the chances of that lovely lady ever reading my blog is slim to none. Now if I could offer some insight any other ladies considering becoming a mistress I would feel Ive enriched someones life.
Everyday we all do things that we know we shouldn't be doing. Some people smoke even though they know that it will eventually kill them. Some people take things home from work even though its considering stealing. And others drink and do drugs even though that turns them into people they wouldn't recognize or even like for that matter.
The first thing I would say to anyone considering becoming a mistress is not do it. You should have more self control to not give into temptation. Now if you feel the need to give in to the urge let me offer you some insight.
As a mistress you need to realize that you aren't going to be his top priority. Heck, you may not even be in his top 5 list of priorities. You will be behind his wife, kids, house, job, car, lawn and TV. But you might be ahead of his priority to sleep because he does need to find time to be with you. After all in order for him to have a mistress he does need to have some time in his schedule for you. So learn your role and deal with it.
Another role of a mistress is to not cause any undue stress to her beau. He has enough stress in his life. His wife, kids, house, job, lawn and TV is stressful enough. So when you have time with him help him relax in a way that only you can provide.
Under no circumstances should you ever nag, bitch, complain, or make ultimatums. Knowing that you aren't high on his priority list you should realize that you are dispensable to him. Those actions could have you out just like last weeks recycling.
You should never expect any thing from him except some of his time. After paying for his wife, kids, house, lawn and TV there may not be anything left for you. Besides he definantly doesn't want to leave a paper trail leading to others finding out about you.
As a mistress you will by no means have any expectations of this relationship becoming exclusive. You should accept your role as a mistress or end the relationship as soon as possible.
With all that said: as a mistress, you do have some power over the dude as well.
He knows that you could blow his cover. With one phone call you could destroy his whole world. He will often share information about himself that he doesn't with anyone else. Knowledge is power.
Well folks, I hope this little bit of information helps you out. Please feel free to add to the list or offer more advice.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Get Out
The best, most profitable night of the year for a cabbie is New Years Eve. This past New Years Eve was no exception. I ran non stop and had a very profitable evening. For the most part it was an evening of constant running. Before midnight most of the fares were picking people up at their homes and bringing them down town. After midnight the dispatcher was so busy from people calling from the bars she shut off the phone and told us drivers just to drive past the bars and give rides to who ever jumped in our cabs.
Sometime after midnight I was cruising past The Page and I see a sweet looking waif standing at the curb flagging me down. So I pull on over and she comes up to the passenger window and tells me that her and her friends need a ride to Durham.
Durham is a college town about 20 miles away and its right in the middle of the busy time. The logical part of my brain is telling me that this fare could cost me money and that I shouldn't do it. The man (AKA Low Down Dirty Dog) part of my brain is telling me that this cutey has friends so I will be going to Durham with a van full of drunk hotties. Needless to say the man part of my brain wins out so I agree.
The sweetheart turns around to wave in her friends as I push the button to open the automatic doors in the van. Next thing you know I got a van full of damn Frat boys. Son of a Bitch! I just got set up and my mind is reeling. How will I get out out of this?
Suddenly as I'm shutting the automatic doors two of those douche bags are in each others face yelling obscenities at each other. I turn around and yell in my best take no shit voice "If you guys don't knock it off I will kick your asses out of my cab!"
The yelling stopped and they apologized. I put the van in drive and pulled away. I started the meter and turned around the corner and suddenly they had each other by the throats. I slammed the brakes and these two dueling dorks came flying to the front of the cab and landed between the front bucket seats. I opened up the door and yelled "get the fuck out of my cab!"
Then those guys started begging me to give them a ride and they will stop. By this point I had it and besides I didn't want to go to Durham anyways. Finally they got the hint and got out with the exception of the little tart that was sitting in the front seat next to me. At this point I wasn't going to buy into her charms. She sat there and tried batting her pretty little eyes at me while pleading with me to take them home. I hated to do it but finally I told her that if she didn't get out the van I was going to call the police and have her removed. With that she told me to fuck off and got out. As I was driving off I could see those two original douche bags involved in the sissy slap fight of the century.
Within a second I had my next fare and I proceeded with my evening as if nothing ever happened. I think I told everyone I had in my cab after that about this incident and we had lots of laughs at their expense. I hope you; the lucky person reading this, can find humor in this too!
Sometime after midnight I was cruising past The Page and I see a sweet looking waif standing at the curb flagging me down. So I pull on over and she comes up to the passenger window and tells me that her and her friends need a ride to Durham.
Durham is a college town about 20 miles away and its right in the middle of the busy time. The logical part of my brain is telling me that this fare could cost me money and that I shouldn't do it. The man (AKA Low Down Dirty Dog) part of my brain is telling me that this cutey has friends so I will be going to Durham with a van full of drunk hotties. Needless to say the man part of my brain wins out so I agree.
The sweetheart turns around to wave in her friends as I push the button to open the automatic doors in the van. Next thing you know I got a van full of damn Frat boys. Son of a Bitch! I just got set up and my mind is reeling. How will I get out out of this?
Suddenly as I'm shutting the automatic doors two of those douche bags are in each others face yelling obscenities at each other. I turn around and yell in my best take no shit voice "If you guys don't knock it off I will kick your asses out of my cab!"
The yelling stopped and they apologized. I put the van in drive and pulled away. I started the meter and turned around the corner and suddenly they had each other by the throats. I slammed the brakes and these two dueling dorks came flying to the front of the cab and landed between the front bucket seats. I opened up the door and yelled "get the fuck out of my cab!"
Then those guys started begging me to give them a ride and they will stop. By this point I had it and besides I didn't want to go to Durham anyways. Finally they got the hint and got out with the exception of the little tart that was sitting in the front seat next to me. At this point I wasn't going to buy into her charms. She sat there and tried batting her pretty little eyes at me while pleading with me to take them home. I hated to do it but finally I told her that if she didn't get out the van I was going to call the police and have her removed. With that she told me to fuck off and got out. As I was driving off I could see those two original douche bags involved in the sissy slap fight of the century.
Within a second I had my next fare and I proceeded with my evening as if nothing ever happened. I think I told everyone I had in my cab after that about this incident and we had lots of laughs at their expense. I hope you; the lucky person reading this, can find humor in this too!
Sunday, January 8, 2012
The Mistress
Denizens of the night often see things that often don't come to light during the day. One would need to keep an open mind and try to see situations from different points of view. I know, I know you re wondering where I'm going with this. Let me explain.
About 3 weeks ago I was working a Saturday night shift. I got dispatched to Market Square to pick up "Brad". (name changed to protect the innocent or not get sued) Dispatcher tells me he is a regular so try to cut him a deal. Well Brad hops in and he has a lady friend with him. He tells me he is going to Stratham which is normally about a 40 dollar fair so I tells him it will be 25 bucks. You know cutting him a deal. We agreed on the price and were off. The lady just starts blabbing about things that this guy obviously has no interest in. After about 5 minutes or so of this incoherent banter the guys cell phone rings. He answered it as fast as he possibly could. I think he was glad to be rescued from the constant drone of her voice. Without trying to eaves drop it came apparent that it was his wife calling and he was out with his mistress.
As soon as Brad got off the phone mistress lady keyed right in on him. She was telling him that he needs to be more cautious or his wife will find out. He needed to dump his wife. He needed to spend more time with her [the mistress]. Just basically nagging the hell out of him. Finally we arrived at the destination. Brad paid the fair and gave me almost a 125% tip. I liked Brad!
I now you guys are probably thinking Brad is a jerk for having a mistress. Heck, I did too for a while until I put some thought into it. I'm willing to bet that anybody reading this is no saint. We all have skeletons in our closets. With that said I put some thought into why guys cheat on their spouses. I know I'm biased because I'm a guy and depending on who you ask I'm a low down dirty dog too. But I think at heart I'm a good person and I really think most people are too.
Some guys cheat because there wife don't have sex with them as often as they like. Some guys cheat because they don't find their wives attractive any more. Some guys cheat because they are bored. Some guys cheat because their wives only care about themselves. Some guys cheat because their wives nag them to death. Some guys cheat because they need to and some guys cheat because they just assholes.
Now lets talk about the other party, the mistress. For one she knows this guy has a wife and she wants to be the only woman in his life. I think she is the idiot in the situation. I'm not sure why this guy feels the need to cheat on his wife. But I'm sure he gets nagged enough at home. Also I'm sure nagging isn't a quality he is looking for in his mistress. My advise to this guy is to have his mistress hit the bricks. Find a new mistress or work things out with the old lady!
About 3 weeks ago I was working a Saturday night shift. I got dispatched to Market Square to pick up "Brad". (name changed to protect the innocent or not get sued) Dispatcher tells me he is a regular so try to cut him a deal. Well Brad hops in and he has a lady friend with him. He tells me he is going to Stratham which is normally about a 40 dollar fair so I tells him it will be 25 bucks. You know cutting him a deal. We agreed on the price and were off. The lady just starts blabbing about things that this guy obviously has no interest in. After about 5 minutes or so of this incoherent banter the guys cell phone rings. He answered it as fast as he possibly could. I think he was glad to be rescued from the constant drone of her voice. Without trying to eaves drop it came apparent that it was his wife calling and he was out with his mistress.
As soon as Brad got off the phone mistress lady keyed right in on him. She was telling him that he needs to be more cautious or his wife will find out. He needed to dump his wife. He needed to spend more time with her [the mistress]. Just basically nagging the hell out of him. Finally we arrived at the destination. Brad paid the fair and gave me almost a 125% tip. I liked Brad!
I now you guys are probably thinking Brad is a jerk for having a mistress. Heck, I did too for a while until I put some thought into it. I'm willing to bet that anybody reading this is no saint. We all have skeletons in our closets. With that said I put some thought into why guys cheat on their spouses. I know I'm biased because I'm a guy and depending on who you ask I'm a low down dirty dog too. But I think at heart I'm a good person and I really think most people are too.
Some guys cheat because there wife don't have sex with them as often as they like. Some guys cheat because they don't find their wives attractive any more. Some guys cheat because they are bored. Some guys cheat because their wives only care about themselves. Some guys cheat because their wives nag them to death. Some guys cheat because they need to and some guys cheat because they just assholes.
Now lets talk about the other party, the mistress. For one she knows this guy has a wife and she wants to be the only woman in his life. I think she is the idiot in the situation. I'm not sure why this guy feels the need to cheat on his wife. But I'm sure he gets nagged enough at home. Also I'm sure nagging isn't a quality he is looking for in his mistress. My advise to this guy is to have his mistress hit the bricks. Find a new mistress or work things out with the old lady!
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